Faux Interview: Rick Ross “The Boss”

Rick Ross

Rick Ross

Gee Pleezer (GP): Rick Ross the boss…

Rick Ross (RR): I had to get at DJ Vlad.  I’m from the streets you know.

GP: You a Miami native.

RR: Port of Miami.  Trilla!

GP: No, I mean were you born and raised in the M I A.

RR: M I A? Naw, I was born in a hospital.  After that I hit the streets.  I couldn’t wait to push weight and gain weigh.  I was the only one doin’ it out of my baby stroller.

GP: (WTF ever) What’s the business on the C.O. controversy.

RR: When I was locked up man…the C.O’s. tried to exploit me, know what um’ sayin’.  They was usin’ my name RICK ROSS THE BOSS so they could get weight.

GP: To get it inside the prison.

RR: That’s true all the way around. You see this medallion.  This is me.  This is how your rent to own.  $45.99 a week for 5 years.  I got 2 more years to go.

GP: That interview 50 Cent did with your baby momma was on fire.

RR: That hoe sold out for a coat.  The thing is, it’s too fuckin’ hot in M I A for a coat…LOL.  She should’ve told that fool to get her a car. 

GP:  That would have made more sense.  I guess 50 knew how to pimp that hoe.

RR: (Rick Ross quickly stood up in anger) Yo, for real, where do you get off callin’ my baby momma a hoe? 

GP: I didn’t mean anything by it.  I was speaking on your level.  You just called her a hoe.

RR:  I do for entertainment purposes.  I love Tia. I love my baby momma.

GP: Right.

RR: (his eyes began to water) This interview is over man.  I gots to go…

GP: Ok…well let me know if I do anything for you.

RR: Fuck you!

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